How This
Nonsense
Works.
Pick a spell. Name the deserving party. Add as much unnecessary pettiness as your budget allows. We'll handle the rest. Allegedly.
Browse the Grimoire →
Basically,
you pay us
to be petty.
O' HEX NO! lets you send ridiculous digital spells to friends, exes, coworkers, siblings and other people who have clearly brought this upon themselves.
Spells start at just $1, because sometimes you don't need twenty dollars worth of revenge. You just need someone to know you were willing to spend a dollar on their inconvenience.
Everything happens online. No candles. No robes. No suspicious midnight activities in the backyard.
Here's exactly what happens.
Six steps to
cosmic justice.
Pick a spell.
Head into the Grimoire and choose the level of inconvenience appropriate for the crime. We've got $1, $5 and $20 spells ranging from mildly petty to financially committed.
Name the deserving party.
Tell us who the spell is for and provide the information needed to deliver it. Double-check the recipient's details. The wizard is many things. A mind reader is apparently not one of them.
Customize the chaos.
Want to stay anonymous? Add Extra JuJu? Include a personal message? Send two spells instead of one? This is where a simple act of pettiness can become a surprisingly customized transaction.
Pay for your poor decisions.
Complete checkout and officially become someone who has spent actual money to send another human being a fake internet spell. Congratulations. We're proud of you.
The spell gets cast.
Once your order is successfully processed, O' HEX NO! prepares the digital spell experience. You'll receive confirmation and the recipient gets the bad news.
They can Cast Back.
Depending on the spell, the recipient may get the opportunity to return the favor by casting one back at you for 50% off. After that, the loop ends. Everybody goes home. The wizard clocks out.
Make it
unnecessarily
extra.
Stay Anonymous
Keep designated purchaser-identifying information out of the recipient experience. They'll know somebody did it. They just won't necessarily know which petty little goblin it was.
Extra JuJu
Scientifically unmeasurable. Legally fictional. Emotionally important. Add Extra JuJu when ordinary imaginary magic simply doesn't feel committed enough.
Personal Message
Give the universe context. Add your own message to the experience, provided you keep it funny, lawful and within our content rules.
Double Trouble
Add a second spell from the same pricing tier for half the original spell price. Because sometimes one imaginary inconvenience isn't enough.
You paid.
Now
what?
You Get Confirmation
After a successful purchase, you'll receive confirmation that your order was received and the digital machinery has begun doing its thing.
No chanting required.
They Get the Spell
The recipient gets a digital notification informing them that someone has cast a spell upon them, along with the applicable spell information and personalization.
If you purchased anonymity, designated purchaser information is withheld from the recipient experience.
The Universe Continues Operating Normally
O' HEX NO! provides novelty entertainment. We deliver the digital experience. We do not control luck, karma, weather, traffic, Wi-Fi, dating apps or missing socks.
Plot twist: they can get you back.
Eligible spell recipients may receive a Cast Back option allowing them to return the favor at 50% off the applicable spell price.
But we're not building a perpetual-motion revenge machine. The Cast Back happens once, and then the chain ends.
You started it. They finished it. Everybody learned absolutely nothing.
One tiny
reality check.
O' HEX NO! is a novelty entertainment service. The spells, hexes, curses, Extra JuJu and cosmic consequences are part of the fictional joke.
We do not claim or guarantee that anything supernatural actually happens.
We're responsible for delivering the ridiculous digital experience you purchased. What the universe does afterward is frankly above our pay grade.
Okay, you get it. Go pick a spell.
Somewhere out there is a person who has absolutely no idea you're considering spending actual money on their imaginary cosmic inconvenience.
Enter the Grimoire →